Drinking Before Noon

I hate email forwards!

2008-01-11T16:16:00.000-08:00

I got the "Who is Barak Hussein Obama" forward again today. I think I let whoever sent me this the first time around slide, but this one annoyed me more since it included an extra paragraph stating you can go to snopes.com to verify the email is true. However, go to snopes and find out for yourself that the email is indeed false. This prompted the following email from me to the unlucky person who happened to keep me on his forwards email list and everyone on that list:

I normally would not respond to one of these annoying forwards, much less hit reply all to spam the email boxes of people that I don't know, but before you send this email to someone else take the time to actually go to snopes.com so you can read for yourself that this email is false (unlike the email below that claims it is factual).

Seriously, take the time to educate yourself about candidates and the issues rather than buy into the mindless forwards sent around.

Unlike the people who send the annoying forwards I signed my name to the email. I sent it about an hour ago and already have my first response of "Get a Life!!!"

I've made my point and have decided that I won't be responding to that email or any other thoughtless emails, even if my first thought is "get a brain, make informed decisions." The funny part is I didn't even say vote for Obama or anyone else for that matter. Ignorant people take themselves way too seriously.

Seriously?

2007-09-30T10:42:00.000-07:00

This is completely unrelated to law or work or any of that. But here is a newsflash for every guy on the planet: If you are sitting on the back of your car in a Walmart parking lot, hollering "hey beautiful" to a woman while she is putting groceries in the back of her car, and she does not respond, don't be surprised. Her lack of answer does not make her a bitch. It just makes you a loser.

Sweater Sets and Fauxhawks

2007-08-31T18:15:00.000-07:00

Does every profession have those people that others in the profession look down on?

I bring this up because I look down on the child support attorneys. I recognize that they fill a much needed service in providing mothers and children with access to the legal system to collect the support that they need and deserve, here's the BUT...

Do they have to dress so unprofessionally? Striped sweater sets with matching pink slacks do not scream respect me. Believe me, I get the fact that suits get old and I sport flip-flops with my suit when I am in my office. However when I am in court, I am in the suit and my big girl shoes.

The worst part is that it is the female attorneys that do this. Women are still at a disadvantage in this profession, especially in smaller counties with an all male bench, do these attorneys really need to make it harder on the rest of us?

As Barney says, "Suit Up!"

Life or Death

2007-08-30T19:43:00.000-07:00

In light of the crazy criminal practice I have somehow got myself into, I have been spending a lot of time pondering the death penalty. I see what you are thinking: very happy topic, Miss M. But really, I have been up to my ears in death penalty cases. Here is what I have concluded: the death penalty should be abolished. Why you ask? The silly reasons are as follows:

It creates more work for me.
It costs more for the court appointed attorneys to represent them.
It kills trees. Lots of them. (And what did the trees do to deserve that?)

As for the more serious reasons, there are a few of those too. Here they go:

No person should decide to take another's life (I know if you are already found guilty of murder this is slightly compromised but signing a death verdict is not much better.)
Finding a way to constitutionally kill people is a problem.
Most civilized societies recognize that capital punishment is no longer acceptable.
The legislature has no right to put its citizens in a position where they are forced to decide if someone will live or die.

The last reason sticks with me. In the past 2 weeks we have been selecting a jury and this seems to be something that keeps coming up. Anyway, these are just my musings on the subject.

Random only somewhat law related post

2007-01-30T18:33:00.000-08:00

The other day I had to go pick up a file for my boss. Not the most thrilling task but it was friday afternoon so I opted for anything that got me out from behind my desk. As I was driving, I was listening to the radio. Which in and of itself is pretty impressive since it seems like people rarely do that now with satellite and ipod transmitters (which I am totally addicted to). So here is what I concluded from my little journey: I really really fucking hate when they play songs in the middle of the day that have to be extremely edited to be appropriate for radio. For example: Puddle of Mudd, She fucking hates me. Ok it is in the song title. The gratuitous cussing in that song is what makes it great. Next: Buck Cherry Crazy Bitch. THe title should give you a hint there as to the content of the song. One more Nelly Must be the money. Seriously? You have to edit out all the lines about drugs? I understand the concern that children will here this stuff but really kids should be in school at this time so my radio should be uncensored. And they wonder why adults don't listen to the radio anymore. So much for the first amendment (there that was the law related part of the post).

Happy New Year....Late I know

2007-01-10T19:21:00.000-08:00

So we have been bad about posting on here. Likely because we work at crazy firms and it just takes too much effort at the end of the day to get back on the computer and type something up.

Such would be the case today except since I am up and bored and TV is sucky, I thought I would post something. There were two things that promptly came to my mind:

My big law firm friend who works in the litigation group bitches because all of a sudden she has 100 things to do. My small firm friend says the same. My very small firm life is the same way. Moral of the story: If you work in litigation, some days you have little some minutes you have tons. If you are getting 6 figures to deal with the 100 things on your desk, don't bitch to me.
Clients call to check on their cases or to hire us. I get this. But sometimes I really don't have any new info. It is not my fault it is taking the court over a year to rule on your peitition. I swear, me calling them is not really going to help. Also, calling me at 530 and going on a tirade about whatever is not a good idea. Cut to the chase or stop talking. And by stop talking I do not mean hang up on me because nothing in the world pisses me off more. Oh and asking if I am the secretary immediately puts you on my annoying list.

That is all for now. I am off to have some wine and go to bed. Tomorrow's challenge: Calendar call. Stay tuned...

Reflections on a certain law school prof

2006-11-29T17:13:00.000-08:00

During law school, I absolutely loathed my evidence prof. Why? Easy. He sucked. His favorite answer was "you will understand after you are in practice and are dealing with it." Thanks jackass. So helpful.

Now I am out in the real world and today was confronted with an issue over admissibility of character evidence in a criminal case. Guess what? It still made no sense. Apparently, after studying evidence in law school and for the bar exam and having practiced for a big bad 3 months or so, I still haven't been in practice long enough to get it. And, this was on appeal, the trial lawyer already made all the objections. So clearly there was something fishy about what they were doing. But trying to make a comprehensible argument as to why the Rules of Evidence were violated was a bit beyond me. I wonder how much time out in the real world it will take for my prof's answer to make sense...something tells me it might just be forever.

What's up with couples who have blog conversations?

2006-11-11T14:53:00.000-08:00

It's so annoying/weird to read someone's blog, livejournal, myspace, etc. in which a couple carries on a conversation within the comments of the entry. Especially when they live together. You see each other every day! Have normal conversations, you know, face-to-face.

It's even more annoying when the comments consist of "No, I love you, more." or "You're the best husband/wife." Ugh, when I read that particular exchange, I think I threw up in my mouth.

Some things are just more exciting in the movies

2006-10-28T21:32:00.000-07:00

I just finished watching Annapolis (better good, hot guys, no shirts, no complaints). Half the movie the guys are boxing, which just looks like it would be so much fun to see in person. However, having attended my first ever boxing match last night, I concluded that it is just better in the movies. There were no dramatic knockouts, no blood flying anywhere, no nothing. Even the 5 drinks I had prior to the matches didn't help the entertainment value. Atleast they were selling beer at the venue or the whole adventure might have been a waste of a Friday night.

*I am willing to say that some matches might be worth seeing live. Like if it was some big name, top ranking guys. Obviously, since I do not live in Vegas or some other big city that draws sporting events like that, this was likely not a high quality boxing situation.

Let me tell you about my neighbor

2006-10-27T16:26:00.000-07:00

My neighbor, luckily does not live on my street, but does live on one of the main streets into our neighborhood. I have to drive past his house to get to mine. Let's call him Bubba (for reasons that will become clear).

On Wednesday of this week, Bubba put up two homemade signs in his yard. These signs say 'If you called Animal Control Stop By".

You see Bubba has a mean dog. I have encoutered said dog while walking my dogs in the neighborhood. During these encounters, Bubba has to put his beer down* to control this mean dog. Apparently someone in the neighborhood had enough of Bubba's mean dog and called Animal Control. Of course, rather than recognizing the problem as his barely controlled dog, Bubba has taken issue with someone being afraid of his dog and contacting the authorities.

The signs are still up, but are being destroyed by the constant rain we've had today. I hope tomorrow they will be gone and not replaced with new ones.

*I have rarely seen Bubba without a beer in his hand: Bubba walks to his mailbox, he's got a beer in his hand. Bubba cuts down our bank to go fishin', he's got a beer in his hand. Bubba walks his dog, he got a beer in his hand. Bubba sits in a bag chair in his front yard with his mean dog waiting for the person who called Animal Control to "stop by" with a beer in his hand. I think I could start my own law firm with the money he spends on beer in a month.*

Clients...blah

2006-10-22T13:59:00.000-07:00

So I really really am not so good at working friday afternoons. I just lose motivation which is why I never scheduled Friday afternoon classes in law school. But since I no longer control all my scheduling, I got stuck with a client meeting at 5:15 on Friday. Grr. So no big deal, I got some mindless stuff done then realized it was 20 after. No client. 5:30. Still no client. Now I am annoyed. I mean really if you are going to request a late appointment atleast show up. No such luck in my world. Maybe that is just karma coming to bite me for all the Fridays that I walk out of the office at 5 sharp.

Anyone know where I can buy some patience?

2006-10-14T20:17:00.000-07:00

Here is what I have decided about why people get frustrated with the legal system in our country. It takes too freaking long. I have been waiting on a ruling on a summary judgment motion since I started. Keep in mind that I do all criminal work so the only thing I have that is subject to civil rules of procedure is habeas corpus stuff. Since the guy is on death row, you would think they would get it in gear but no.

So basically, it drives me crazy how long everything takes. I am not a patient person to start with and this does not help. Of course, the first response to a motion to dismiss I did resulted in the appeal being denied a mere 24 hours later. Why is it that bad news is the only thing that comes quickly?

College Game Day...

2006-09-30T07:36:00.000-07:00

has become the official tour group of Ohio State Football? Seriously? I recognize that ESPN and ABC are trying to cross-promote each other, but this is stupid. Do I really want to see the Game Day guys at an Ohio State game every other weekend? Not particularly.

Before th ABC/ESPN/Disney take-over the world merger, Game Day went all over the place to wherever the biggest game was. Now, it's to wherever the ABC Primetime Game is. The real downside to this is that musty old fart in bad jackets, Brent Musburger, pops up on Gameday.

Hand-me-downs from the boss?!?

2006-09-29T16:30:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure what's more insulting about the hand-me-downs from my boss-the fact that I would look awful in everything she gave me or the fact that she thinks I'm actually big enough to be the sizes she gave me...

What's up with the tassel?

2006-09-29T16:28:00.000-07:00

I have a SOL (statute of limitation, for non-lawyer people) for tassels hanging on the rear view mirror. It is 3 months after you have graduated from HIGH SCHOOL. Not college, not graduate school, but high school. It looks ridiculous for a GROWN PERSON to drive around with this one. Especially, if said tassel has faded into different colors since you've had it hanging around that long.

Latest in a series of things from the Bar

2006-09-16T17:36:00.000-07:00

My license arrived in the mail!!! I can officially be sworn in now and then I can really really actually be a lawyer. And I checked out the website and I don't have to pay dues until next calendar year. And my boss said to just submit the bill and they would pay it all. Yay. And the license is kinda cool looking. Overall, I am very pleased. Now I just have to find the right outfit for my swearing in, because really, it is a great excuse to buy new clothes.

Best line of the day

2006-09-16T17:34:00.000-07:00

So yesterday I was reading a response to a motion filed in superior court. At one point in response to an argument the attorney actually wrote "This is poppycock." I mean, who says poppycock?!?!? It made my day really.

Blah

2006-09-05T16:56:00.000-07:00

ok the real world is overrated. I am thinking maybe a year of this shit then I am headed back to academia where I can sleep in the afternoons.

Sell Out Much??

2006-09-02T15:34:00.000-07:00

Football season is just around the corner and no one could be happier about this than me. And with it comes some really great commercials about football. Like the Corona one where the ref calls for an illegal block party. But anyway, stupid ones also come with it. And the great opportunity to see who has sold out this season. My award for this goes to Peyton Manning. Already. As if last year wasn't bad enough, this season he already has one for Direct TV Game day and I think sprint. And those ones with his whole family. And while I always will enjoy the ones where he is the cheer leader for all those random guys (like the accountant), give it a break for a while Patton. I mean, at this point, is there anything he won't do a commercial for? I am amazed he has time to play football at all.

Bar-Check!

2006-08-26T11:42:00.000-07:00

Since Ms. M is at Walmart as I type, I will post this for both of us: we passed the bar!!!!!!
All the blood, sweat, and tears paid off and we are now lawyers (or will be when we are sworn or get our licenses or something).
Woo-hoo!!!!

Myspace and Stupid People

2006-08-23T13:25:00.000-07:00

Generally, despite having both an undergrad and graduate degree I am not a degree snob and I don't think you have to have one to be interesting or worth my time. That being said, I had when stupid people message me over Myspace. The lastest was a short one liner from some guy 6 years my elder stating simply, "your a cutie." Grammer error all his. Ok. Seriously? So I take the compliment and look at his profile. No high school degree. Less than $30,000 a year. Works as a photo person. No skill involved. Seriously? What made you think I would write him back? I mean my profile clearly shows me as highly education and the guy can't even bother to write a sentence using proper grammer. I mean really? Thinking all this might make me a complete bitch/snob but really in this particular case I am willing to own that.

Really, if the guy had used proper grammer and said something mildly intriguing I would write him back. I am friendly like that. But we had nothing in common at all. So why waste my time or his?

How not to throw a rehearsal dinner...

2006-08-23T13:13:00.000-07:00

As was obvious from prior posts, I was in a wedding this past weekend. Due to more important things in my life I haven't had time to post (whine and bitch) about it. Shocking, I know, that something else could be more important. So here is the first of many to come on the comments about how not to do a wedding.

The rehearsal at the church went pretty smoothly. The priest rambled but having been going to that church for some time when I lived in town I was not surprised. So afterwards, we headed to the dinner. Very loose interpretation of the word dinner. I am not an overly classy girl but this was far less that I expected. Literally, all "dinner" consisted of was pulled pork, hamburger buns, that nasty vinegar slaw they serve with NC BBQ, chips and the best part--ice cold hush puppies. Ew. Drinks consisted of pops and bottled water. Serving dishes: to go type boxes, styrofoam. Plastic glasses.

Next Location: As a rule it is never a good idea to ask your guests to drive into the ghetto for dinner. Now exceptions can be made for really good hole in the wall places but this was no such thing. It was a rec center at a local middle school. Folding tables, no table clothes. And the best part: name tags for all. Yes this was a classy affair.

The real kicker tto the whole situation was that half of the bridesmaids don't eat pulled pork, a fact the bride was well aware of. As were the groom's parents in warning the vegetarian in the group that she "might was well stop and get something to eat because there would be nothing there for her" Yeah way to accomodate your guests. I understand money can be an issue but there were ways around that, that would not have had half the girls in the wedding toting in take out fast food to the rehearsal dinner. Tasteless.

I would love to blame the bride for this but really she looked annoyed and had not control over the food because it was left to her soon to be inlaws. Craziness. Definitely not what you want to do to your closest friends. And certainly not to ones that have driven some distance to be there for you. More to come on this weekend...

So, the wedding

2006-08-23T07:35:00.000-07:00

The wedding had a start time of 2pm (actual start time 2:10) and lasted until about 3:30, it was a Catholic wedding, so that was to be expected.
The reception however did not start until 6pm, nice lag time of 2.5 hours. Just glad I wasn't an out-of-town guest and could go home and grab something to eat. In retrospect, it was a good idea to go hang out in the a/c as the reception site could not be bothered to adjust the setting as to not make the place sweaty and hot for 100 or so guests, including men in suits. It's the middle of August in the South, how can you not have the air set at least 65 to accommodate loads of people in dress clothes?
Not a way I would chose to spend a Saturday, but the things you do for friends...
It was nice to see Ms. M this weekend and a few others, but I'm glad wedding season for us appears to be at an official end.

**There were other things besides the temp and time of the reception to bitch about, but I thought Ms. M might like to share her insider's view.

Stupid people annoy me

2006-08-15T11:23:00.000-07:00

Today I ran over to Subway to grab some food for lunch. I had this gift card for subway so it seemed like a logical choice. And it wouldn't take all that long since I was in a hurry to get back to lounging on my couch. So they make up my subs and ring everything up. Enter giftcard. Then they actually ask me if i want to use it to buy my sub. My sarcastic self really wanted to say "No, I just thought I would take it for a walk then pay with cash. Why the fuck do you think I handed it to you??" Well, clearly they are not the brightest crayons in the box so it takes 4 of them to figure out how to run the gift card. And then they look at me like i am stupid when it is short of the total even though clearly laying in front of them is the balance in c ash. So after about 5 minutes of them struggling with the thing they give me a free cookie. yay cookies. Still not pleased. So finally they decide just to ring it up as a cash sale and figure it out later. I mean if the company offers giftcards is it too much to except that they would actually know how to redeem them when someone wants to use them??

More Wedding Blahs

2006-08-14T17:01:00.000-07:00

Is it wrong to go the lovely couple's registries and be amused at all the zeros for gifts fulfilled? At least the $1,000 plus things have been removed.
Another friend was married a short bit ago and her registry was nearly complete when I got around to purchasing her gift. Quite a contrast between the two.

In other news: when the groom was asked about seating at the reception, he first told me there won't be a seating chart (no biggie there), but he then informed me that there will not be enough seats for everyone and that fits into his plan about people not all trying to sit at one time. This should be interesting...